Beautiful Disaster Lit's 200th Article!!!!! Reflections of A Blogger (Revisited)

Flavor of the Day: Lavender Scout Master

Music Vibes: Two Weeks- FKA twigs

Psst.... It's my birthday on Monday!

I write today amazed that I am on my 200th article, and I feel so blessed for those who have helped me support my dream. I am a determined person, but I get discouraged easily. Every share, every conversation about the blog, every time someone proudly says, "She writes a blog.", every merch bought, every show of support I have appreciated more than I can ever show, and it has kept me going all of the way to #200. I can admit this blog is my baby, and it's the longest commitment I've had in a while, aside from Daughter, but I wouldn't have gotten here without everyone standing behind me.

I just read my first article, "Manifesting My Life" (you can read it at: https://www.beautifuldisasterlit.com/post/manifesting-my-life), to see the difference in my writing. Yeah, it was my first post. I was such a spaz!!!! MSSS gave me advice when I first started the blog, "Don't Post While Lit." and I've kept to it. Editing and posting, I am clear-headed. (OK, my process has changed in 2024. I'll write, edit, & schedule to post while lit, but I revisit my article multiple times before it officially posts, as well as after it posts.) My writings seem to be more organized and on topic and more and more people seem interested. I love seeing new people interact on the FB page and enjoy my articles. I finally have a focus besides traveling and writing full-time. I want to advocate for and support victims/survivors of abuse. I'm slowly working on things with a local organization in my community, and I'm excited but nervous at the same time. I know that I'll be helping people going through some things that I can't relate to, but to help give them strength and understanding still drives me. I know that there will be some situations that break my heart but to be there for someone who needs someone to show that they belong here, that they're cared for, is so totally worth it.

There are so many things that I have wanted to do and have not been able to make a priority before. Although I'm unemployed, I'm still being productive and I'm able to make them a priority now. I'm still looking for a job that would best suit me as I focus on my health, and I'm still looking for ways to be my own boss, create my dream company, and live the life that I'm working hard for. I know I'm working my ass off, but part of me still gets discouraged by the slow growth, but then I look at the FB group with over 300 members in less than 3 months, and I look at the people in it, supporting one another and I'm fucking proud that I have created an environment for people to feel safe and that they can be themselves and they cheer others on. (We are now over 800 members, so if you haven't already, go visit https://www.facebook.com/groups/305771694459692 to join!)

The views on my blog keep moving up gradually, and I am so proud and grateful, but I have to remind myself to keep being humble & not to let any growth go to my head. I've been living every day appreciative of what I do have, having spent so long focusing on what I don't. Let me tell you, I am a lot happier, that's for damn sure. Yes, I get frustrated or wish I had something more than I do now, but I just try to tell myself to focus and work hard to be the person deserving of whatever I am wanting. I look at the people who already know that I'm worthy and I still am astounded by the continued support that I've had. Continued support that just keeps growing and I pray that I am able to reach the lives that I'm meant to reach and leave the impact that I am destined to.

What I've learned during my reflections of a blogger is that losing myself is no longer an option; I can help people and still make myself a priority. I won't be taken advantage of and I refuse to be the only one giving in a friendship/relationship. I'm setting boundaries like a mo-fo, but I'm still staying positive and kicking ass. People can have boundaries and not have to explain themselves. People can tell you no and not have to explain themselves. We need to start respecting others, even if it's by leaving them the fuck alone.

I am still looking into ways to make money with my blog, but if you want to send me a blunt to celebrate or because you like my writing, my CashApp & Venmo info are on our contact us page: https://www.beautifuldisasterlit.com/contact-us. Don't feel obligated, because I just fuckin' appreciate you taking to time out of your day just to read my articles. You ROCK!!!

Be the best you!

🖤💋💨