The People You Spend Time With Should Be Your Biggest Cheerleaders

Flavor of the Day: La Mota’s house-made Galactic Cookies pre-roll

Last weekend, Daughter & I took a trip to Rockaway Beach, OR to put our feet in some ocean & enjoy a weekend away. Even though the weather wasn’t the greatest, we enjoyed shopping and taking the train ride, where we saw a lot of beautiful scenery. We even saw seal heads pop up in the bay & hillsides covered with blackberries. Part of our weekend adventure included some little hikes, where one took us to the Cape Meares Lighthouse. The whole weekend was filled with gorgeous nature, but Saturday night, we were both tired & ready to relax with a movie or two and of course, munchies. Daughter suggested that we watch Legally Blonde with Reese Witherspoon. I had been thinking about watching it recently as well because it’s such a great movie, so I was all for it. I was happy we both quickly agreed on a movie, as that is not always the case!

As I watched it for the millionth time, I paid attention in a different way than I had before, things resonated with me differently than any other time I had watched the movie. I watched as everyone continually underestimated Elle, but she proved them wrong over & over, not once losing her fierce determination or her drive for very long. Elle’s outer appearance gives people the impression that she’s a dumb blonde with big boobs, but underneath she’s an intelligent & kind spitfire who builds confidence in the people she believes in. She has faith in her people & they have full faith in her and her abilities. She cheers them on when they’re feeling low, or finds a way to build their self-esteem & they show her the same support. This is what a sense of community feels like.

As I was writing this article, looking for the writer of Legally Blonde, I came across the following on Google: “Legally Blonde” the book is written by Amanda Brown and tells the story of her own real experience at Stanford Law School, where she decided to go based on the shopping mall nearby.” I love that Legally Blonde is based on a true story & it’s hilarious how she chose her school. (OK, so now that I know it’s a book, I MUST read it!)

I absolutely adore Reese Witherspoon as an actor and I have for a long time. Her company, Hello Sunshine was part of the inspiration behind me starting an editing/publishing company of my own under Beautiful Disaster Lit. Obviously, they will be completely different companies & entities with little similarities. From the outside looking in, Reese seems to embody the best characteristics of Elle, but in her own way.

Elle didn’t have to be mean or put others down to show that she’s one powerful bitch, she continued to be kind as others were rude or straight-up bullies. In a way, I can relate because I just can’t understand why people would be mean & hurtful for no reason. I guess in a way there is a reason behind unkindness, but it’s usually because of the other person’s own insecurities or internal trials. It doesn’t make it right, but it’s true. Some people just don’t try to be better & take it out on the people who deserve it the least. Regardless, Elle prevailed in the end by hustling and not letting anything get in her way like any strong, intelligent woman does.

My confusion is, why are we as human beings not already trying to build a kind world? Why is kindness so hard to find nowadays? Why is the bare minimum something we find ourselves striving for? Why do we put up with things that we shouldn’t?

Elle not only trusts her instincts, but she stands with conviction in the things she believes in and she sets clear boundaries that she sticks to. (One of my downfalls is sticking to boundaries that I set.) I like that part of the moral of Elle’s story is to not let men or a love interest keep you from your goals, the right ones will align and support you through them. They allow you to have the focus you need & keep the distraction at a minimum. Don’t let the haters hold you back from building the life you want to live, in fact, let their hate fuel the fire under your ass to work harder & better. In the movie, Warner painted a clear picture of how some men don’t support you & don’t fully SEE you until it’s too late. Good thing, Emmett saw what Warner didn’t!

Watching the scene where Elle is in the library studying with a friend & she looks out of the window, sad that she can’t join the party outside. Her friend noticed her distraction & put Elle’s focus back on track of studying for the LSATS. That’s how friendships should work. Your friends and family SHOULD feel safe talking to you about things & holding you accountable, if you react with anger or silence, the problem is you. None of us are perfect, we are all constantly learning, but we also learn by feedback & observations from others who have a different perspective than we do. The people closest to us know better than any stranger. If your closest people don’t feel comfortable talking to you about the hard things, ask yourself why. We should also have the courage to speak our own truth, through the shakes & the queasiness because sometimes it’s hard to stand up for yourself! It sucks, but it’s better than being a doormat.

After the first movie, we put in Legally Blonde 2 because Daughter had never seen it. Again, Elle didn’t have to be unkind or put others down to be a powerful boss bitch. She didn’t get sucked into the meanness & dishonesty of the others around her. I don’t like the second movie as much as the first, but the quote that stuck out to me most was, “Trust your voice.” Trusting my inner voice & my intuition is difficult for me, mainly because I’m stubborn and I don’t like to listen to things I don’t want to hear. I will listen and hear, but I’ll grumble about it. I’ve been steadily working on trusting my gut with things & most importantly trusting myself in regards to people, including myself. I think it’s essential to living the best life you can. Being observant and gaining awareness of yourself, others around you, & situations can help you gain confidence in those gut feelings you get. Learning & living through a mindful mindset can allow you to be self-aware & know the signs you are seeing & how to approach them.

To me mindfulness is living & loving, knowing your intention & working towards the desired outcome. I have not been living as mindful as I’d like, especially with my writing because of my own personal struggles. I’m working to correct that & living a more focused life. Obstacles happen, but if you’re still focused & intent on your goal, you can make it. Just learn to be ok with changes & mishaps along the way because they WILL happen, no matter how much planning you do. That’s ok, it’s part of growing & sometimes the spontaneity of something or the changes may be better than what you have envisioned. Just keep at it & don’t give up. During the hard times, remember your cheerleaders that are in the stands rooting for you.

Thank you so much for reading and remember the great words of Elle Woods:

“It is with passion, courage of conviction, and a strong sense of self that we take our next steps into the world, remembering that first impressions are not always correct. You must always have faith in people. And most importantly, you must always have faith in yourself.“

🖤💋💨

SUBSCRIBE