Finding Ways To Stay Resilient Through the Chaos: Life Lessons From "Under The Tuscan Sun" Movie

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Spoiler Alerts: This article may contain some spoilers, so if you haven't seen the movie, I recommend checking it out on Disney+ and Hulu for free. You can also rent it on Amazon Prime, YouTube, or Fandango.

RV living isn't for the weak, that's for sure. You discover how many ways you can be resilient & then uncover how adaptable you really are when you're thrown another wrench in the gears. I was having an off day, exhausted from all of the fires I've been putting out since I started RV life, & I put on a feel-good movie that always makes me feel better. Diane Lane is an extraordinary actress & she was the perfect choice to play Frances Mayes, our heroine in the movie, in my opinion. Although the start of my new journey wasn't because I found out my husband was cheating on me from another writer that I gave a bad review on, such as Frances, I still had a life change that pulled everything out from under me, quite literally.

As I watched Under the Tuscan Sun, I laughed, I hurt, & I loved just the way Diane's character did, the reaction you want to have with every great movie or book. Deciding to write about the movie, I not only put it on again to gain more inspiration, but I was determined to do a little research to see if there was a story behind the movie, which there was. The movie "Under the Tuscan Sun" is based on the memoir of American author Frances Mayes with the same title. The book was a New York Times bestseller for over 2 1/2 years & it not only talks about how she bought & restored a rundown, abandoned villa in the Tuscan countryside, but it has pages of recipes for those culinary hearts.

Frances starts the divorce steps & finds out her husband & his mistress want the house that she used her mother's money to renovate. Talk about a hard slap in the face. When she & her best friend were celebrating the divorce being finalized, she was gifted with a 10-day romantic tour of Tuscany, Italy, which she didn't accept right away. Her friend found out she was pregnant & she & her partner wanted to be cautious about flying so early in the pregnancy. That was the start of her epic adventure.

Side note: Can someone gift me 10 days in Tuscany?!

On her "gay" romantic tour, she was able to focus on herself & meet lots of unique personalities, which was not very different from me meeting all of the different people on my new adventure. Along the way, she comes across a sign for Villa Bramasole, which is a legitimate villa that the real Frances Mayes owns, its actual name being Villa Laura & it's available to rent at luxuryretreats.com or through Airbnb. During her visit, multiple signs point her to this dilapitated villa & she impulsively decides to buy it, without even looking at it or knowing the real issues that it came with, very similar to the RV I decided to buy. Little did I know that this gem would come with all of the expensive repairs that need to be done, but in the end, it's MINE. It was the life I wanted, but because it wasn't when I wanted it, I was ashamed. I worried about what everyone was thinking & worried about the judgment that would undoubtedly come, but in the end, it was the only solution that I was willing to consider. In the end, it is my choice & my life; people can either support me & my decisions, knowing I try not to act rashly when it comes to life's choices, or they can choose to not be a part of my journey. Quite frankly, I'm really tired of everyone thinking they have a say when they aren't living my life & I didn't open the door to their opinions & judgment. It's not an open-door policy; in fact, it's a very closed door, except for the few I allow in.

Sometimes, you just have to take the leap, no matter how scary it can be, because there is a better life waiting for you on the horizon; you just have to work your way through all of the obstacles & heartaches.

In the movie, Frances hires a misfit crew to help her renovate the house & they become part of her new, chosen family. The crew & her new town bring an array of distinctive personalities that slowly become the faces of her new community. She learns new languages, a whole new culture, & different ways to laugh through the chaos of her new life, a great reminder to me when I am navigating my own life's mayhem. The story shows that if you pay attention & listen enough, people can provide you with a whole new world outside of your wildest imagination. I watch the movie with envy, wishing for the life I feel I am called to have. Sometimes, with all of my focus on getting that life, I lose perspective of actually living it. I lose perspective of what I am working towards, but I am grateful to my tribe for reigning me back in & providing me with new experiences, reminding me that although I need to work for the life that I want, I can't overlook the life that I have of the people standing behind me.

Equally, I am grateful to myself for living those new experiences, for being resilient through the hard times & for having the heart to care for so many. Life is filled with trauma in many different forms. Going through my own trauma has made me want to help others through theirs, be the support that I wish I had, or that I'm grateful was shown.

Community is essential to living, you've got to cherish the old & be open for the new, but be selective with who you allow in your community & your life, not everyone deserves a seat at your table. Italians & other cultures use food, among other things, to maintain that community & although I don't typically care for cooking, I do enjoy hosting friends & making delicious food for us to chat over or experiencing with a new recipe to share. I haven't hosted many dinners in the RV, as I learn the faults & fix what is needed, but there will be a time when I invite people over again & will enjoy throwing get-togethers differently than before.

"How are you ever going to be happy if you keep wallowing?" Katherine, Frances's new friend, gives her a lesson with some tough love that all of us need at times. She tells her to just get on with her life & stop waiting for something to happen because it will happen in its own time. This movie is full of great reminders to just live life, embrace it as it is, explore your surroundings, & make the most of every opportunity, which Frances does when she kisses a stranger. A kiss that leads to a torrid, brief love affair.

Side note: Although I'd probably never have the guts to kiss a stranger on the street, & I don't recommend you kiss every handsome stranger that crosses your path, it's the very definition of seizing life's opportunities. Start saying "yes" when you just want to say no. You never know what experience is around the corner. Say hello to the stranger & put yourself in new, uncomfortable situations. You never know the narrative behind the soul you're looking at until you take the time to learn their story.

Sandra Oh plays Patti, the best friend 'til the end that we lucky ones have in our lives. She even ends up going through her own trauma, joining Frances in her charming little villa, filling it with the family that Frances once wished for. Again, showing us that sometimes your hopes & dreams manifest in a different form than you envisioned for yourself.

So remember to take the crumbled walls, missed opportunities, & second-guessing in stride, & stay resilient through the chaos of life. Nothing will ever be easy & it's the mishaps & mistakes that make life an adventure. Call upon your community when you need the support or the reset; they'll be there, getting you out of your cramped RV and seeing the big picture when you may not be able to. Don't lose hope because humans were meant to be strong, adaptable, & resilient, life won't give us what we can't handle.

If you haven't yet, please check out Under the Tuscan Sun, an inspiring movie set in the beautiful Tuscan countryside. I'll also be adding the book to my list now.

Thank you for reading & joining me on my RV living journey, if you see me losing hope, please be that tough love reminder that things will get better because I need that just as much as the next person.

If you enjoyed Under the Tuscan Sun, you might check out Falling Inn Love on Netflix, where a woman drunkenly signs up for a contest to win an inn, but she signed up for more than she bargained for, as she meets her own set of eccentric characters, forms new relationships with townspeople, & fix up her little inn to be green with zero net energy. This movie will give you feel-good vibes with the comedy to keep you laughing.

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